1. |
the moss
02:50
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We slept on the moss outside the hospital
After the bastards in blue stole you from us
Well actually, I didn’t sleep at all
My swollen brown eyed sockets anxiously huffed and puffed
The packs of rolled golds that you gave me
around the drizzling neighbourhood all fucking night
And I picked your favourite flowers growing
In opposition to the terrifying, towering concrete
When we found you barely conscious lying on the Powell street sidewalk
We secretly sang our sacred songs into you
Despite the security cameras, the bootlicking paramedics
And the yuppie bystanders
I deleted the videos on my phone sporting a broken screen
I stared into it in disassociation and the cracks spoke to me
But I can’t seem to delete my memories
Of when my racing heart got shoved around
As the precious dreams in your head hit the ground
Is this what being young is supposed to be?
Is this what being young is supposed to be?
Is this what being young is supposed to be?
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2. |
getaway driver
02:14
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I don’t know how to drive
Yet
But the day will come and we’ll celebrate
With hey y’alls at trout lake
On a fingers crossed sunny day
And we’ll borrow Bobo's truck
And I’ll help you move into your next collective house
You’ll get demovicted from
Maybe I’ll drive us up north
If we can muster up the money and the courage
Let me be your getaway driver, baby
Your getaway driver, baby
You’ll hold my hand as we stand in line
At the ICBC on the drive
The weeb behind us will try to make conversation
And say, “can you believe he was elected again?”
I will say that I don’t really give a shit about electoral politics
‘Cause no politician has our existence in mind
No politician has our existence in mind
No politician has our existence in mind
I just came here to pass a test
So that I can be your getaway driver, baby
Your getaway driver, baby
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3. |
the coals of my anger
02:22
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I dropped the coals of my anger that you had placed on my shoulders
I don’t wanna give you the satisfaction of our self sabotage (mmmm)
Our pronouns changed with the clocks as we entered the equinox
Said you wanted to go on that walk but we talked about nothing
The crows watching us laugh and say all we had to do was ask
We shouldn’t tell each others futures but we should make the most of everything
I got so good at lying to all those institutions
But it seems that I still can’t hide how I feel about you
And I’m so done at trying to live up to a label
There are no words in English to describe what I wanna do
But I’m so done on giving up, we need time and space to process
And set better boundaries
My so-called mood disorder takes me places
Where I’m supposedly not supposed to be
They don’t want the spirits to talk to me
And they like that you don’t listen to your hunches
But I hear them so clearly
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4. |
my sweet, sweet revenge
02:54
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You knew that I was warm hearted
So you went ahead and took advantage
But you didn’t know that I’m cold blooded
So, I’m plotting my sweet, sweet revenge
Yeah, I’m gonna get my sweet, sweet revenge
My, my sweet, sweet revenge
We shared a smoke as you called me soft-spoken
And that’s when I knew I fit in your pocket like a token
Put me out, put me down
Give me space to plan it now
Put me out, put me down
Give me space to plan it now
Put me out, put me down
Give me space to plan it now
Put me out, put me down
Give me space to plan it now
You knew that I was warm hearted
So you went ahead and took advantage
But you didn’t know that I’m cold blooded
So, I’m plotting my sweet, sweet revenge
Yeah, I’m gonna get my sweet, sweet revenge
My, my sweet, sweet revenge
My sweet, sweet revenge
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5. |
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You drew me like you said you would
Yeah, you drew me like you said you would
So I wrote you a song
To kiss you back
But you’re all the way in Montréal
Walking your dog
As I miss you
I’m sitting on the sand
Strumming my guitar
Jamming with the waves and the seagulls
Hearing the whispers
I’m sprouting like a plant
Sharing my medicines with my
New friends
Or were they old friends
But I miss being on the land
Cooking our foods
Laughing till we cry
Stoking the fire
Listening to your stories
Falling asleep under the bare sky
The bear sky
You drew me like you said you would
I can’t believe
You drew me like you said you would
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6. |
city secrets
03:42
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You hide city secrets from the tourists
that visit your body
You were an ant that I let crawl
all over me
We’ve got the same ankles, they like to kiss each other
In forests of unshaved grass
But your mind is always somewhere else
Somewhere I will never find, I’ll never find your mind
It was the fight for money
in a stale, gentrified, burning city
A labyrinth we struggle to find our way through
“I’m too tired to dream”, you say
As I dream hungry everyday
I hide inside my turtle neck
From all the sky train screeching
in pheromonal July sweat
Everyone is fighting, everyone is fighting
for a seat
I look out the window to see millionaires
watering their own buildings
while burning down others to build more of their own
Making it harder and harder for us to live
But I wrote another song for you
I wrote it down
And sang it inside out
Replayed it through my earwax earbuds
I sang it so fucking loud
You said you were so proud
I forgot that you’re always proud
Of my pain and the ways I survive
I’m trying so hard to exist
It’s so hard to exist
But I like to resist
And I want my friends to exist
So I guess I’ll also exist
So that we can all resist
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7. |
lusting after enbies
03:46
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So much for lusting after enbies
It’s almost as if I need to heal what’s buried deep inside of me
To set better boundaries / I’m setting boundaries
Expectations, hopes and fantasies
Get the freaking best of me
Why are they always out in Montreal
Or right next door?
Lessons learned, I’m growing into my mortal body
I wanna merge our bodies
But I’m making you a playlist
I’m making you a mixtape
Cause these songs are the only way
For me to say what I want to say
Like when
You rush back to her
Well she doesn’t want me around
You stay back with him
Well he doesn’t like my sound
So, so
So much for lusting after enbies
Trying to heal what’s buried deep inside of me
I am figuring it all out
I’m setting boundaries
Ohhhh x4
I’m setting boundaries
I’m setting boundaries
I’m setting boundaries
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8. |
the war on life
02:06
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The coins lying around
the corners of the house
all added up to buy
you a pack of gum
From
the gas station
where we once made out
We then escaped the sounds of the war on life
The urge returned, spilling itself all over me
We’re not as delicate as they make us seem
We’re not as delicate as they make us feel
Sharpen your tools
Now you’ve got a weapon
And hold on, hold on
Hold on to it
Sharpen it
That demon in my dream
Loved me
Unlike any state ever could, ever would
We fought against the war on life
as we gathered the coins lying around
the corners of the house
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9. |
scum of the earth
00:35
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How does it feel to be used
How does it feel to betray
You are just a tool
That we’re gonna bury
Scum of the earth
Scum of the earth
The slimy gunk spat out
By your rotten leaders
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10. |
this dog
02:26
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11. |
spiritual warfare
01:58
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Fed bits of plastic and styrofoam since childhood
That’s all they knew was what tasted good
But there’s so much out there
Beyond the lack of imagination
I killed them with kindness
Didn’t let them control me with my anger
I used my anger to kill them with kindness
Didn’t win every battle
But they never got through with their spiritual warfare
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12. |
ripples
04:45
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I drank a cup of punches and kicks this morning
Smoked my depression away for a moment
Scheming for this shitty, I mean city, these so-called countries
To burn down and that a liberated world rises from the ashes
Rises from the ashes
It’s happening now, it’s happening here
To tell you the truth I feel the fear as well
But together we’re so fucking fierce
Comrades and loved ones, behind bars
The trauma ripples out wide and far
But we’ll fight for love and fight with rage and target the colonial state
I hope that every cop, every judge, every prison guard,
every narc, every resource extraction worker,
every boss n every politician die and are reincarnated as our comrades
Reincarnate yourselves into our comrades
Quit your fucking job
It’s happening now, it’s happening here
To tell you the truth I feel the fear as well
But together we’re so fucking fierce
Comrades and loved ones, behind bars
The trauma ripples out wide and far
But we’ll fight for love and fight with rage and target the colonial state
Did you hear about the fires, did you hear about the floods?
Yet there’s still pipelines being built, sacred old growth forests being logged
People’s homes at the tent city being raided
Indigenous land still being invaded
Oil tankers on the shore
We work so hard but we’re still poor
Global pandemics spread and they isolate
And we become the scapegoats
The victims of the hate
What will it take
Ask yourself what will it take
Because
It’s happening now, it’s happening here
To tell you the truth I feel the fear as well
But together we’re so fucking fierce
Comrades and loved ones, behind bars
The trauma ripples out wide and far
But we’ll fight for love and fight with rage and target the colonial state
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Mal Content Vancouver, British Columbia
they/them
Music made on xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam), Səl̓ílwətaʔ (Tsleil-Waututh), and Skwxwú7mesh (Squamish) land
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